Tuesday 28 May 2013

good evening

It's been years.
LITERALLY.
I'm a uni student now. I finished my first year today.
I've just read through all my old posts, it's crazy to think how obsessed I was with all my Js, actually it's a little scary.
I still smoke too much, I drink FAR too much...I just came out of another short but intense relationship with a guy at uni...not another J, thank god. It hit me pretty hard to be honest, but I'm going to be just fine.
I have to move out in a week and a half or so, really can't be bothered with the hassle. At least I get a nice student house out of it at the end...seriously, I look over the SEA. The fucking SEA is my back garden...pretty cool :)
I don't actually think I've changed all that much since I was last here. There's less of an emphasis on food in my life, though the feelings of not wanting to eat are still kind of prominent at times...I'm much more of a drinker now, I had to see a substance misuse team for a while actually.
Anyhow, I might post here a little bit more when I have problems, I mean..that's what this place was for, at least for me. I have myself a new student blog too, which I might share with you at some point, but we'll see.
It looks like a graveyard around here. No-one's posted for a long time.
I'm not all that surprised, it was all too dramatic to last long :)

Love xx

Friday 23 September 2011

Let's be honest.

I'm just not that honest.

Thursday 22 September 2011


That effortlessness, the easiness? I want that perfection.
And yeah, there are flaws in every one of us, but sometimes
the flaws are the perfection in you, and I want that. The
perfect flaw, it couldn't have been any other flaw because it
makes you, like a need to drink tea, or a hole in your tights.
Perfection is so very, very beautiful.

Wednesday 14 September 2011

Wow, you're lucky...two in a day :)

Tried to eat scrambled egg before, but I threw it up. Almost had pasta, but just said no. I feel like I can't eat anything at the moment...I'm just not in the mood. Or, I want to eat, but I just can't, that's really what it feels like. It's lovely :)

115, going dooooown.

Lily xx
I've lost 5 pounds in 5 days...3 days on a liquid fast :D VERY happy indeed. Just another 25 to go until I'm at my GW of 90 :D

Friday 9 September 2011

I don't feel like eating

I don't want to eat anymore. Is that okay with you?
I want to stop and be thin for my boyfriend. I want to be thin for my own mind. It's broken.
It's time to be thin, ladies and gentlemen, so let the fun begin.

Saturday 27 August 2011

I loved a boy,
With a golden glow and
A broken soul.